A good many husbands are utterly spoiled by mismanagement. Some women keep them constantly in hot water; others let them freeze by their carelessness and indifference. Some keep them in stew irritating ways and words. Others roast them. Some keep them in a pickle all their lives.

No husband will be tender or good if managed in this way, but they are really delicious when properly treated.

In selecting your husband, you should not be guided by the silvery appearance, as in buying material; nor by the golden glint as if you wanted a salmon. Be sure to select him yourself, as tastes differ. Do not go to the market for him, as the best is always brought to your door. It is far better to have none unless you will patiently learn how to cook him.

A preserving kettle of the finest porcelain is best, but an earthenware pot it will do, with care. See that the linen in which you wrap him is nicely washed and mended, with the required number of buttons and strings sewn on. Tie him in the kettle by a strong silk cord called comfort, as the cord called duty is apt to be weak, and they are apt to fly out of the kettle and be burned and crusty on the edges, since like crabs and oysters, you have to cook them alive.

Make a clear steady fire out of love, cheerfulness and neatness. Set him as near to this as seems to agree with him. If he sputters and fizzles do not be to anxious; some husbands do this until they are quite done. Add a little sugar in the form confectioners call kisses, but no vinegar or pepper on any account. A little spice improves them but it must be used with judgment. Do not stick any sharp instruments in to see if he is becoming tender.

Stir him gently; watch the while lest he lie too flat and close to the kettle, and so become useless. You cannot fail to know when he is done nicely with you and the children, and he will keep as long as you want, unless you become careless and set him in too cold a place.